WendyBusse
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It sounds like you have had a long, difficult relationship with food. “Guilt” over eating the “wrong” foods can so easily rob you of the joy of eating. When you have had a lifetime of fear-mongering about food, it can take some time to change that inner dialogue – but keep working and reach out if you need support.
The “Wellness” industry promotes elimination diets as a “cure” for almost every chronic health challenge. It’s often seen as a natural solution, but as you know, it can lead to food-related anxiety and a diminished quality of life. Working with the nutritionist “planted the seeds,” of food fear, and that kept growing. Now you can rip out those weeds!
That is wonderful, Tanner. Rather than rigidly focusing on food as the cause of feeling unwell, your perspective is broadening and becoming more flexible. Rather than your energy going to “What did I do wrong?” you can focus on self-care.
That is understandable. Our brains are geared toward figuring out cause and effect. If you can figure out the exact cause, you can control it. I guess another way to look at it is accepting a few symptoms. When we focus on the symptoms (i.e., trying to figure them out), they often take center stage in our day. But if we accept that we might not always feel well, the symptoms can merge into the background, and we can get on with our day. I hope that helps.
Yes, that is wonderful progress😊 – stepping back to question your automatic assumptions that food is to blame (i.e., approaching food more objectively). Also, it sounds like you are allowing for some uncertainty. When we are caught in reactive mode, we want answers! But in a more responsive mode, it is easier to accept that you may not know the exact reason why you are feeling poorly.
Is there another habit or daily routine that you can link it with? Ideally, it could be when 1) you are waiting for something – traffic lights, line ups – or 2) you are doing tasks that don’t require much attention – housework, walking, etc. That way you are not adding “one more thing to do,” but using your time efficiently. Another option is setting a timer on your phone.
I know what you mean. Even with all the work I’ve done over the last twenty years, I still go into reactive mode more than I’d like to. It would be wonderful to feel grounded and secure all the time. However, that’s probably not realistic. Healthy nervous systems can freely move between reactive and responsive mode. Reactive mode feels uncomfortable, and we typically want to figure out why we feel that way so we can fix it. But with that intense focus, we stay locked in reactive mode! By acknowledging, accepting and bringing self-compassion, we allow our nervous system to be flexible and cycle out of reactive mode when it is ready.
That is amazing self awarenss and the ability to step back and question an automatic assumption.
Hi Sara – I am glad that you have joined us for this program. Reach out if you need support.
That does not sound strange at all! ❤️It sounds like being able to enjoy your meals has shifted you toward food-pleasure associations (away from food-illness associations). It makes sense that this would soften your fear about food. If anyone else wants to check out the article on Creative Meal Ideas (Bonus Section), it’s available here.
I would suggest starting with short, close-to-home trips.🚗 Gradually work up to longer trips and those that are further away.
Way to Go!🎉Thanks for sharing that. For any other participants, Teresa is referring to the nine steps in Week 1: Respond, rather than react, to Unpleasant Sensations
Yes, this is a great first step to feel more comfortable eating food that you have not personally prepared, especially since it sounds like you can go over the menu in detail with your friend. You could also offer to bring one of the dishes. 🌻
That is a great example of food freedom. You had the flexibility to satisfy your hunger without overthinking the decision.
That sounds amazing.🎉 Most people take eating out for granted. However, restriction can lead to more appreciation when you finally have that freedom. If you haven’t seen it already, I have a section on eating out in the Bonus Resources.
